. Worth More Than A Sparrow .

Saturday, 31 May 2008

♥

race day(:

all the best joash!

{/11:31 am}

<3, me

Monday, 26 May 2008

♥ bad haircuts.

WAH I WANNA KILL SOMEONE!

had a short parade with CO today.. then RSM went to check everyone's hair. (honestly i think my hair is FINE. okay, if u think it was long, leave a tag :P) he forced all of us to go have a haircut at the army barber.... no choice of haircut. and.. wah lao.

i've had bad haircuts but this really takes the cake =/

{/9:17 am}

<3, me

♥

NEW BLOGSKIN!! (:

yeah i realise it looks a bit sissy, but it did look cool on the preview!! i'm too lazy to change now, so we'll all live with this for another.. year or so. haha :D but i really like the blog theme!

{Matthew 10:29-31}
"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows."

many a times, obsessed by what others say of us, their opinion, how they judge us, we keep on forgetting that our value's not in Man.

there's Someone out there who loves us with a love greater than what the entire world could ever possibly give. (:

so yeahh. you're worth a lot. don't forget that. (:

worth more than a sparrow(:

{/12:29 am}

<3, me

Thursday, 22 May 2008

♥

i realise i haven't blogged abt my days in a while.

okay. vesak day. went out with ian, chris, and all our parents. that was.. fun (:

TODAY!! AFC CROSS-COUNTRY!!!

dang i never realised how much i missed all my friends. just the canteen breaks, complaining who has got the worst posting/boss/working hours is just.. great!! feels good to be back with the pti family(:

sean chua, as usual, was doing insane amounts of pull-ups. he does unlimited sets of 10 pull-ups. i think he hit a few hundred. easily.

matthew is getting buff too. 20 pull-ups man (: and his rubik's timing has gotten even more gay from course time, TWENTY-FIVE SECONDS. like whoa. gay crap:P

i came in 10th for the cross country. yay. i was running closely behind trevor, but being in a state of exhaustion, i gave up trying to overtake him. but just at the last min, arvind came out and yelled "COME ON TREVOR!! FINISH IT!! HURRY UP!!!"

trevor, being trevor, just smiled and pointed two thumbs at his back (for i dunno what reason) but anyhow, me being me, i gave a large animallike war cry and sprinted my heart out. which gave trevor a shock (: then i won. HA. YAY!! :D

dang dang dang. i miss every one. hopefully section 3 outing is coming soon (: east coast? khairon's suggestion. speaking of which, instructor khairon ORDs on the 1st of july -_-''

bugger.

prize presentation, i won a bronze 10th position medal, and a toyoini electric desk fan for guessing the cross country distance. (5.44km) everyone guessed 4.something, but i guessed 5.21km. yes i'm brilliant. muahahaaha.

and i reached home at 2:30pm (: watched a lot of youtube (as u can see below) then had an awesome qt!

then i ran agian. AHAHA.

elisha is an amazing guy. you guys should check him out in 1&2 Kings(:

and.. thats's it. book back in by 11:30pm. then SLEEPLESS IN SETTLER'S TMR :D

WOOT!

and i need a less emo blogskin.

{/9:02 pm}

<3, me

♥ hillsong kids!

you guys gotta check out hillsong kids, they're so cool and hip. hahaha. i wanna join :D

can't stand it, it's realy so cool!! HAHA.

check out FREE: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USOcPsol-1w&feature=related

VERY COOL (:

and very cute too. hahaha. all those kiddies jumping!!! *boink boink boink*

this is the day (must watch!) : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZCraZvCGC8&feature=related
my redeemer lives:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zGYgJs7fPHQ
king of majesty: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zpn5AneeI4E
tell the world: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PgVV1jHh2hE&feature=related

looks like a party is going on in there. haha. i wonder if they'll grow up one day to really mean what they sing and really jump for joy cos jesus lives in them. i hope so(: it's so awesome. hahaha.

i feel very happy now :D

BANZAI! (:

{/3:20 pm}

<3, me

Wednesday, 21 May 2008

♥

it's amazing how many times "u're a failure joash." runs through my head a day.

someone wise told me that the way to not emo.. is to just stop.

another wise person told me that emoing is bad because all it is is really self-pity.

and self-pity is bad.

stop. stop trying to take responsibility for everything.

{/11:06 pm}

<3, me

♥

AFC cross country tmr. meeting all the PTIs once again.

the crowd of white singlets and macho men (:

{/10:28 pm}

<3, me

Tuesday, 20 May 2008

♥

{/9:42 pm}

<3, me

♥

how do u tell someone older that they're wrong?

{/7:46 pm}

<3, me

Thursday, 15 May 2008

♥

"my hands weren't made to fly..."

"all i want is you sitting here by my side..."

lines from Angel by Edwin Wong, performed by Overgate.

BANZAI! i just realised i made 3 posts in one day. record (:

{/10:03 pm}

<3, me

♥

"i don't care anymore.
i'm just gonna lose myself in the music."

how tempting. ha.

but then again, i don't need to care. i got jesus (:

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest" - Matthew 11:28

{/9:47 pm}

<3, me

♥

(WARNING: possibly emo post.)

in a state of confusion =/

sometimes u wonder about all the things you've done in life.

what if.

what if.

not that i have any regrets about my life, don't get me wrong. i'm pretty happy.

but what kind of influence have i had on people?
would the world be a better place if i haven't lived in it?
what would people say at my funeral...?

"whew good riddance he's gone"?

okay, no one is gonna say that out loud. but still.

okay this post is starting to sound absolutely ridiculous, but i'm just gonna keep it for memory's sake. silly emo joash moments.

still. i do wonder the what ifs.

{/8:28 pm}

<3, me

Tuesday, 13 May 2008

♥ burning coals

ahhh... jc memories(:

"BURRNING COALS EDWIN!!!! BURNING COALSS!!!!!" :D:D:D

refer to proverbs 25:21, 21 if u wanna get the joke.

but then again u probably won't get it :P

{/9:09 pm}

<3, me

Sunday, 11 May 2008

♥ The Room

The Room...
In that place between wakefulness and dreams, I found myself in the room. There were no distinguishing features except for the one wall covered with small index card files. They were like the ones in libraries that list titles by author or subject in alphabetical order. But these files, which stretched from floor to ceiling and seemingly endless in either direction, had very different headings. As I drew near the wall of files, the first to catch my attention was one that read 'Girls I have liked.' I opened it and began flipping through the cards. I quickly shut it, shocked to realize that I recognized the names written on each one. And then without being told, I knew exactly where I was.

This lifeless room with its small files was a crude catalog system for my life. Here were written the actions of my every moment, big and small, in a detail my memory couldn't match. A sense of wonder and curiosity, coupled with horror, stirred within me as I began randomly opening files and exploring their content. Some brought joy and sweet memories; others a sense of shame and regret so intense that I would look over my shoulder to see if anyone was watching.

A file named 'Friends' was next to one marked 'Friends I have betrayed.' The titles ranged from the mundane to the outright weird 'Books I Have Read,' 'Lies I Have Told,' 'Comfort I have Given,' 'Jokes I Have Laughed at .' Some were almost hilarious in their exactness: 'Things I've yelled at my brothers.' Others I couldn't laugh at: 'Things I Have Done in My Anger', 'Things I Have Muttered Under My Breath at My Parents.' I never ceased to be surprised by the contents.

Often there were many more cards than I expected. Sometimes fewer than I hoped. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of the life I had lived. Could it be possible that I had the time in my years to fill each of these thousands or even millions of cards? But each card confirmed this truth. Each was written in my own handwriting. Each signed with my signature.

When I pulled out the file marked 'TV Shows I have watched', I realized the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three yards, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of shows but more by the vast time I knew that file represented.

When I came to a file marked 'Lustful Thoughts,' I felt a chill run through my body. I pulled the file out only an inch, not willing to test its size and drew out a card. I shuddered at its detailed content.

I felt sick to think that such a moment had been recorded. An almost animal rage broke on me. One thought dominated my mind: No one must ever see these cards! No one must ever see this room! I have to destroy them!' In insane frenzy I yanked the file out. Its size didn't matter now. I had to empty it and burn the cards. But as I took it at one end and began pounding it on the floor, I could not dislodge a single card. I became desperate and pulled out a card, only to find it as strong as steel when I tried to tear it.

Defeated and utterly helpless, I returned the file to its slot. Leaning my forehead against the wall, I let out a long, self-pitying sigh.

And then I saw it.. The title bore 'People I Have Shared the Gospel With.' The handle was brighter than those around it,seemed newer, almost unused. I pulled on its handle and a small box not more than three inches long fell into my hands. I could count the cards it contained on one hand.

And then the tears came. I began to weep. Sobs so deep that they hurt. They started in my stomach and shook through me. I fell on my knees and cried. I cried out of shame, from the overwhelming shame of it all. The rows of file shelves swirled in my tear-filled eyes. No one must ever, ever know of this room. I must lock it up and hide the key. But then as I pushed away the tears, I saw Him.

No, please not Him. Not here. Oh, anyone but Jesus. I watched helplessly as He began to open the files and read the cards. I couldn't bear to watch His response. And in the moments I could bring myself to look at His face, I saw a sorrow deeper than my own.

He seemed to intuitively go to the worst boxes. Why did He have to read every one? Finally He turned and looked at me from across the room. He looked at me with pity in His eyes. But this was a pity that didn't anger me. I dropped my head, covered my face with my hands and began to cry again. He walked over and put His arm around me. He could have said so many things. But He didn't say a word. He just cried with me.

Then He got up and walked back to the wall of files. Starting at one end of the room, He took out a file and, one by one, began to sign His name over mine on each card. 'No!' I shouted rushing to Him. All I could find to say was 'No, no,' as I pulled the card from Him. His name shouldn't be on these cards. But there it was, written in red so rich, so dark, so alive. The name of Jesus covered mine. It was written with His blood. He gently took the card back. He smiled a sad smile and began to sign the cards. I don't think I'll ever understand how He did it so quickly, but the next instant it seemed I heard Him close the last file and walk back to my side.

He placed His hand on my shoulder and said, 'It is finished.' I stood up, and He led me out of the room. There was no lock on its door. There were still cards to be written.

'I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.'-Phil. 4:13 'For God so loved the world that He gave His only son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.'

{/2:03 am}

<3, me

Thursday, 8 May 2008

♥

THEY ARE EXTENDING MY OPS!! AHHHH!!!

if they extend it until i miss another tm412, i'm gonna kill someone. arrghhh.

sian.
sian.
sian.

{/8:29 pm}

<3, me

Friday, 2 May 2008

♥

To all who feel like you've fallen too far from the grace of God...

you can never fall too far(:

Do you not know?

Have you not heard?

That His mercies are new every morning!

And He loves you with an everlasting love!!

i don't know who needs to read this, but someone does. and it might be you reading this now (: God normally doesn't bring the same thing back to my head three (or maybe even more) times to blog about, just out of coincidence.

Let him who has ears, let him hear! (:

{/7:38 pm}

<3, me